Of course, that's just my opinion, I could be wrong

Quite a day

The Foxy Croppers had their holiday party today and this year we made it an all day Pajama crop. I got there around 10AM and stayed until abotu 7:30P. It was nice to see everyone. There were about 30 girls there all parading around the Burbank Hilton in their Pj's. We looked cute. I got 8 pages done so I'm really happy about that. Only one needs journaling so I'm basically done with them. I'm slowly catching up... slowly. I'm up to April 2005. I'll get there eventually.

On a sad note, Mel's mom Jane passed away this morning. She's been fighting pancreatic cancer (the worse kind) since around May so she went pretty fast. Mel said according to the hospice nurse, she went very peacefully in her sleep ("the first time she's been quiet or peaceful in her life" - quoting Mel) at 7:30AM this morning. So that was a good thing. The memorial service will be Monday and then he'll fly to New Jersey for the burial, hopefully, happening on Wednesday. Jane was certainly the most difficult woman ever to walk this planet and Mel's actually fine with all of this emotionally. Intellectually, it's a sad thing but he said to me "I know it sounds strange, but I've been emotionally numb for a long time. Intellectually...I'm sadder about what I never had than what was lost today." Jane made his life miserable so he's certainly lifted from that burdon which is a good thing. I hope he can continue healing, come to grips with all that happened and be happy now.

I'm feeling fine at the moment post transfer. I was feeling a little crampy or "something" yesterday. I think I spent a little too much time on my feet. I was out for about 2 hours doing errands. I feel much better today after sitting pretty much all day. I just think it's going to be a long haul here until we know where we're at. I'm overly paranoid with every twinge, pain, ache, feeling, every time I go to the bathroom etc. I'm doing what I can to remain positive and optimistic. But then alternately, I'll have a moment of depression that I'm old and my "eggs" are bad and how totally unfair that it. I'm NOT old. Why is my body acting old? It's a lot frustrating. We go to the Dr. on Friday for a bloodtest to see how it's all going. I'm just doing one day at a time and I've managed to be able to give myself the Progesterone shots while Gregg is out of town. That's pretty impressive when the shots are in my behind.

posted by Juls @ 11:14 PM