2005 in Review
Got this from Foxy April. Had to give this a go.
2005 In Review
JANUARY
1. Did you have a new year's resolution this year?: No, because I know I don’t follow through with them
2. Who kissed you at midnight?: We were sleeping. We had to get up at 3AM to work the Rose Parade
3. Did it snow where you live?: No, thank goodness.
5. Have you ever been to Times Square to watch the ball drop?: Yup, in high school in 1981 and 1982.
FEBRUARY
1. Who was your valentine?: DH, of course. Carly, Tazzie & Keely too.
2. What did your valentine get you?: Besides cards and lots of love, I don’t remember.
3. When you were little, did you buy valentines for your whole class?: Absolutely and I remember putting them in every person’s little bag.
MARCH
1. Are you Irish? Nope.
2. Did you wear green on St. Patty's Day?: I think I did.
3. What did you do for St. Patty's Day?: My Aussie friends were in town so I’m sure we went shopping.
APRIL
1. Do you like the rain?: Love it!
2. Did you play an April Fool's joke on anyone this year?: I don’t think so.
3. Did you get tons of candy on Easter?: I don’t celebrate Easter but I’m sure I ate some chocolate. (Ma Nishtanah)
MAY
1. What's your favorite kind of flower?: I like Lillies. They smell wonderful
2. Do you like the spring? Yes, because it’s getting warmer.
3. Finish the phrase: "April showers bring...": May Flowers (had to look it up on askjeeves.com
4. What would you think of as a spring color?: light pastels like green and yellow
JUNE
1.What year did you graduate from school?: high school 1982 college 1986 (I’m old)
2. Did you go on any vacations last June?: Nope.
JULY
1. What did you do on the 4th of july? Went to the Hollywood Bowl to celebrate Disneyland’s 50th, saw all the characters and the best fireworks in town.
2. Did you go on any vacations during this month?: No such luck this month either.
AUGUST
1. Did you do anything special to end off your summer?: I worked like crazy in August on Big Brother 6, Miss Teen USA Pageant and the MDA Jerry Lewis Telethon. I don’t think I had 3 days off.
2. What was your favorite summer memory of '05?: Seeing “Wicked” and working on “Big Brother”.
3. Did you go swimming a lot in the summer?: A little bit. Carly took swim lessons and LOVED going in the pool.
4. Did you go to the beach a lot?: No not at all.
SEPTEMBER
1. Did you attend school/college in '05?: Carly started Transition for pre-school, does that count?
2. Who is/was your favorite teacher?: I remember Mrs. Robinson, my 11th grade history teacher, really inspiring my love for US History. And Mr. Lish, my orchestra teacher. When you see a teacher every day for 3 years, you get to know each other.
3. Did you like fall better than summer?: I’m a warm summer weather kind of gal.
OCTOBER
1. What was your favorite halloween costume ever?: I don’t think I had a favorite. I remember being a gypsy and a hockey player. I’m sure there was more.
2. What's your favorite candy?: I’m really into Reeses this yeawr.
3. What did you dress up like this year? As a Mom watching her daughter go trick or treating for the first time. It was awesome.
NOVEMBER
1. Whose house did you go to for Thanksgiving? My parents. Just them and my family. And still plenty of leftovers cooking for only 5.
2. Do you like stuffing?: Yummy stuff.
3. What are you thankful for?: A great family, everyone’s healthy, two wacky dogs, good friends and lots of scrapbook supplies
DECEMBER
1. Do you celebrate Christmas?: Nope, Hanukkah.
2. Have you ever been kissed under mistletoe?: Yup.
3. What do you want this year for Christmas?: That’s a tough one. We didn’t exchange pressies because there’s nothing that we need.
4. What's the best present you ever got for christmas?: I’m sure I’ve gotten some awesome gifts. Being on our honeymoon in Australia in 2001 was a great day.
5. Do you like cold weather?: ONLY when I’m skiing because I’m mentally prepared for it. Otherwise, I hate being cold.
6. How would you rate your year on a scale of 1-10?: Around a 7. Had an amazing year with Carly. She’s just an incredible, funny, fun kid. A few friends passed away which is simply inexplicable. It all ended a bit tough with wanting to be pregnant and all that we’ve gone through with that. Overall, it was a pretty good year. I hope 2006 is even better.
How was your year??
Hanukkah Day 6
Day 6 of Hanukkah was another good day for everyone. Carly got a package of sidewalk chalk from Alan and Marie. (Remember, 8 days, 8 presents but they've done really well and they're all cute little presents which is wonderful). From us, Carly got her very first Barbie and some clothes. She's got a lot of toys this week so it's overwhelming but she already loves her Barbie.
From Auntie Deb, she got a "My Very First LeapPad". Considering we have the younger LeapPad that she has no patience for, she's already into this one. She was playing and correctly guessing her letters and numbers. Carly really likes this one so I'll go to Target tomorrow and buy her some more stories (Dora, Princess, Wiggles, etc.) that go with this one.
Uncle Gary and Christine spoiled ALL of us rotten. We actually feel bad because we didn't really do anything for them. Well, we got something for Gary but not Christine. We're quite embarrassed and will have to make it up to them. Carly got a Clifford backpack, a Dora Uno game, Disney Princess Magic book (her 3rd copy) and a box of Princess stickers. They did really well. I got (yes I got a Hanukkah present) a $30 GC from Bath and Body Works and a really nice set of smelly soaps. Gregg got a cool agenda notebook from the Triple AAA baseball All-Star game in Sacramento, a book on the 2005 World Series winning Chicago White Sox and a golf jacket. Here's a photo of me and my soaps. Photo taken by Carly, finger in the frame and all.
Other than Hanukkah, I went scrapping today with Melissa. I'm working on a mini-album and got about 20 pages done. I'm really happy about that. Another few hours and it'll be done. Woo-Hoo!
Hanukkah - Day 5
Well, might as well keep up with it all since there's only 3 days left. Tonight was much more low key than last night, thank goodness. Tonight Carly got a Barbie Princess dress from Alan and Marie. And from us, she opened a Princess Doodle where she can practice writing her letters and a foam animal alphabet set. She went right for the Doodle and started drawing. At least we didn't set anything on fire like last night's tissue paper. Forgot to mention that in yesterday's entry. That was fun... NOT.
Hanukkah - Day 3 & 4
Well, I've had a shitty day today. I feel like crap. Sad and depressed. Then I get into this deep discussion with my sister about what's been going on. It's good to get some of this out but it's only been a capper on a horrible "feeling sorry for myself" day. I'll get over it. I'm tired on top of all of this. Too much on my mind for me to sleep well at night. No work on the horizon, thus no money to pay for my bad SB habits, not pregnant, bla bla bla, It goes on and on.
A lot of my Foxy friends are doing goal lists for 2006. My mind really isn't in the right frame to work on this. I can't even think of one thing to set for a goal. Okay one. I need to lose at least 10 pounds. I will do that after the first. Other than that, what? Get work is maybe another one. Save enough money for a digital SLR. Scrap more. Hey! I'm coming up with a list. What do you know?? I'll keep thinking and maybe I'll get to 10 like everyone else.
The Hanukkah report. Day 3 - we went to Micah's house (a boy from Carly's class) for a big Hanukkah party. There were about 40 people there. Mary Ann made yummy homemade latkahs. Carly had a bit of a run in with one little boy who apparently hit her but we were in the other room and didn't see it and she didn't know which kid it was. At least, it wasn't one of her friends. She was fine (although she came into the living room a little upset and needed a cuddle) even though she didn't tell us what happened until we got home. Again, she was fine but just needed to tell us. Anyway, each kid got a book on their way out. Carly got "Curious George at the Parade" which she loves. Last night's presents included a little purse from Alan and Marie, a bracelet with her name on it from Sondra and a Belle watch and Princess book & CD player from us.
Tonight, Day 4 - Big night in the world of Hanukkah. Presents from Grandma Gail. She got a Princess long sleeved shirt. A top and pants from Naartje and a big playground toy set with about a billion small pieces that are sure to be lost by the end of the week. Carly also got two little knitted bears from Aunt Sondra and a shirt (size 6-7, huh?) from the Gap. Cute but many years from fitting. Off to the mall on that one. The piece de risistance? A Cinderella bike!!! We spotted it in Costco about a month ago and voila, it's hers. She's actually a little small for it but only barely. The look on her face was priceless. Her hands went above her head, a huge smile and "WOW!".
As promised, finally, here are some Hanukkah pictures. Enjoy!
I'm a Charlie Brown
I saw this on Missy's blog. She's a Lucy. Very cute.
Check it out for yourself. I can't get the link to work so you'll have to cut and paste. Sorry about that.
http://quizilla.com/users/anonymousnowhere/quizzes/
Which%20Peanuts%20Character%20are%20You?/
Hanukkah - Day 2
Today was much smaller that yesterday. Carly got to pick which pressies she wanted from two piles. The Mom and Dad pile and the "everyone else" family pile. From us, she picked a collection of Cinderella stamps and inks and 2 Princess puzzles - Belle and Ariel. And from Grandpa Alan and Marie, she picked 2 gifts (they sent 8 small gifts and she didn't get one last night) and she got a Princess crown and earrings and some beautiful princess "high" heels complete with jewels and feathers. She'll try the shoes on tomorrow. We were ready to go to the hockey game.
We set up the dollhouse today and opened up the other rooms furniture that Grandma Cookie, Grandpa Lee, Alli and David supplied. It looks great and Carly LOVES it. She played with it for over 2 hours today until we pulled her away for a bath. Oh this is a great gift. I never had a dollhouse growing up (Alli will confirm) so I'm totally living vicariously through my daughter on this one.
Pictures tomorrow.
Hanukkah - Day 1
First of all, I hope all those that peruse this little slice of me had or is having a wonderful holiday. It was a quiet day here although Kari got me out of the house for an hour to go pick up SB goodies at Ginger's. That made for a nice little holiday treat and it was really nice to talk to her. We rarely get a chance to be just the two of us (it's usually the 3 of us with Lisa) so it was a nice time to chat. And I needed a little girl time chat with all the shit that's been going on. Still a few tears, but that's expected and I don't see that being different for awhile or until we go see the Dr. again.
Anyway, we went up to my parents house up in Ventura for the annual gift bonanza. We stopped giving gifts to each other (Carly doesn't count) a few years ago because we're always stumped at what to get, we have everything, and then to have to deal with birthdays, anniversarys, Mothers and Fathers Day, etc. It was too much. So we tend to shoot the wad at Hanukkah. Gregg and I got some very nice gifts from my parents and Alli & David. The single cup coffee maker, a DVD recorder (so I can finally start to dub and dump the 3 boxes of VHS tapes I've collected over the years), a SB book, round of golf, and a few more things. All good stuff. Carly, of course, has made out like a bandit. So much so, that she didn't even open all her pressies. She was busy playing with a few things that she lost interest in opening the others. They'll be spread out over the next few days to keep the celebration happening. She got a big dollhouse and several rooms and accessories (the things that haven't been opened yet), a Princess blanket, a Snoopy doll, Dora stickers (never go wrong with stickers), we got her a Princess blowup futon bed (which hopefully she'll like and use when she comes into our room instead of crawling in with us), and a few more things which are escaping my little brain at the moment. Suffice it to say, she did well. Now tomorrow, we'll try to weed through some of the old toys and put them away. She's got a huge pile of gifts from lots of different people. Carly's raking it in this year, that's for sure.
After what Gregg and I have been through, no pressies for us. He did get me a pair of purple Dansko clogs to add to my collection. Love 'em! Can't have enough of these.
Happy Chrismakkah everyone!!
I've had better days
I got the call from Dr. P about 2 hours ago and I'm officially NOT pregnant. All that stuff didn't take. Yes, we're very disappointed. Not exactly the results we were hoping for. There's not much to do at the moment, I need to get my period to get back on track etc. We'll go see Dr. P. after the holidays to determine if there's anything else we can do, what our options are etc. In the meantime, I just have to try and cope with all of this. I refuse to believe that all my eggs are bad but yet maybe they are. I cannot accept that I was only meant to have one child. She's gorgeous, fun, funny and truly the joy of my life but I still can't believe that she's all I'm meant to have. I haven't felt positive since yesterday and this is probably why. I was not trying to be pessimistic, just realistic. The odds were not in my favor from the beginning and simply got worse as we went along. I think I'm also angry and that I feel like this whole process was a huge waste of money for nothing. I feel like we've wasted a lot of time (6 months to be exact) with all the testing to determine what's wrong (nothing according to the bazillion tests), then wait for my cyst surgery, bla bla bla. That clock has been ticking very loudly and now this. I'm not really sure what do to right now other than cry it out for awhile. And then call in January to see the Doctor. I guess this puts a little damper on the happy part of the holidays this weekend.
But in an totally unexpected, huge moment, Carly went on the potty today all by herself!! Yes, she's been going when we start to catch her and she's VERY slowly getting it. But today, she was walking around without her diaper and the next thing we know, we hear the happy music of her potty. We asked if she did anything and she said "Yup, I went pee pee." I go to check and sure enough, there's stuff in there. All by herself! No prompting from anyone. We're SO proud of her. Hopefully, this is the start and she'll figure it out in the next week or so. Now, I have to go clean up the thousands of packing peanuts she dumped on the floor, crumbled up and made confetti out of.
Quite a day
The Foxy Croppers had their holiday party today and this year we made it an all day Pajama crop. I got there around 10AM and stayed until abotu 7:30P. It was nice to see everyone. There were about 30 girls there all parading around the Burbank Hilton in their Pj's. We looked cute. I got 8 pages done so I'm really happy about that. Only one needs journaling so I'm basically done with them. I'm slowly catching up... slowly. I'm up to April 2005. I'll get there eventually.
On a sad note, Mel's mom Jane passed away this morning. She's been fighting pancreatic cancer (the worse kind) since around May so she went pretty fast. Mel said according to the hospice nurse, she went very peacefully in her sleep ("the first time she's been quiet or peaceful in her life" - quoting Mel) at 7:30AM this morning. So that was a good thing. The memorial service will be Monday and then he'll fly to New Jersey for the burial, hopefully, happening on Wednesday. Jane was certainly the most difficult woman ever to walk this planet and Mel's actually fine with all of this emotionally. Intellectually, it's a sad thing but he said to me "I know it sounds strange, but I've been emotionally numb for a long time. Intellectually...I'm sadder about what I never had than what was lost today." Jane made his life miserable so he's certainly lifted from that burdon which is a good thing. I hope he can continue healing, come to grips with all that happened and be happy now.
I'm feeling fine at the moment post transfer. I was feeling a little crampy or "something" yesterday. I think I spent a little too much time on my feet. I was out for about 2 hours doing errands. I feel much better today after sitting pretty much all day. I just think it's going to be a long haul here until we know where we're at. I'm overly paranoid with every twinge, pain, ache, feeling, every time I go to the bathroom etc. I'm doing what I can to remain positive and optimistic. But then alternately, I'll have a moment of depression that I'm old and my "eggs" are bad and how totally unfair that it. I'm NOT old. Why is my body acting old? It's a lot frustrating. We go to the Dr. on Friday for a bloodtest to see how it's all going. I'm just doing one day at a time and I've managed to be able to give myself the Progesterone shots while Gregg is out of town. That's pretty impressive when the shots are in my behind.
Not as great as we hoped for...
It's been a bit of a rough day today.
When I spoke to Dr. P. yesterday, we had 8 embryos cruising along. They were going to do PGD and we'd know the results when i went in this morning. Well, the results weren't exactly what we were hoping for. 7 of the 8 had abnormalities. The last one has a possible abnormality but they can't say conclusively. They might have seen something on one of the chromosomes but they also acknowledge that it could be a shadow kind of thing so it could be a false-positive. So, after quite a few tears and a VERY uncomfortable full bladder (that was awful), we decided to transfer the one. Hopefully it will stick and then, assuming it does, we'll do a CVS test at 10 weeks to see what the real deal is and then make whatever decisions, if necessary, at that point.
The ultrasound Dr. was very sympathetic and he said we made the right decision. And my Dr. was great too. She was disappointed and never would've expected this but it also explains our previous difficulty in getting/staying pregnant. Needless to say, I'm quite disappointed. Lots of tears and with the full bladder (I had to drink a full liter of water, without peeing, in about an hour) I was a mess. Luckily, I was a littl "too full" so I could elminiate some of it which helped the pain but not the emotional, obviously. I'm having a little trouble coming to grips with this whole concept that basically my eggs are no longer "good". Makes me rethink my entire life and my age, etc. It also means that we don't have to deal with the IVF thing again because after removing 12 eggs and basically 11 weren't good, what's the point of going through the whole expense and shots again. Sure we could get pregnant on our own but that's only one egg (as opposed to the multiples taken the other day) and who knows if that would be good. I'd like to think that my body "knows" what's good and will accept accordingly. So I'm trying to take it one day at a time and be positive that this one sticks. So that's pretty much my story, as I'm laying here on my bed with my laptop. I'll need a few more weeks of positive thoughts and prayers. And today, I'm even more grateful for my beautiful C.
Saturday morning update
Dr. P. called me about an hour ago. We have 8 embryos developing, 2 maybes and 2 no go's. So we're all very pleased. Now, we'll get another update on Monday to see how they're doing and then they'll do a biopsy to see how "good" they are. And depending on how many that are still viable, we'll determine how many to implant. But I'm happy with 8 and maybe 2 more. We're on our way. Keep those body parts crossed.
An even dozen
Dr. P. retrieved 12 eggs today, 3 more than expected. So that's all a good thing. The lab will do their "chemistry experiment" today and call the Dr. tomorrow to tell her how many "took". Then she'll call me. So keep those fingers, toes, whatevers crossed that there are some good eggs to work with. The procedure went well. Nice and quick. I remember seeing 10:50AM on the clock and then the next thing I saw was 11:35AM on the clock in recovery. So it took the 20 minutes or so as expected and all went well. I feel fine but a little tired. But that could also be the cold that I've got. It certainly feels more like that than residual anasthesia. More to come tomorrow and the transfer will be Tuesday if all goes well. Thanks for the love and support everyone!! VERY appreciated.
Counting down to 11:45P
That's when I have to take the HCG, final stim/egg maturing shot. Fun fun. Hey, it's better than at 3:15AM which is when they thought I might have to take it. I guess it has to be timed EXACTLY 35 1/2 hours before the procedure and luckily, it moved up to Friday at 11AM. And I get one whole day tomorrow without a shot. I'm looking forward to that. Let's see how we do on Friday...
Houston, we have follicles...
Well, went back to the doctor's today for my every other day schlep to Cedar in rush hour, and it looks like the retrieval will be Friday. Woo-Hoo! Dodged the flute concert bullet after all. As of this morning, I have 9 follicles at 15mm with a few more at 13mm so they may be good to go by then too. I go back yet again tomorrow morning and hopefully that'll be it. No more stim shots, just one more shot to mature them and then they can get 'em on Friday. Yes, then there'll be some more shots after the transfer next week won't be fun but I think I'll be back down to 1 shot instead of 4. Again, woo-hoo! I get excited for the little things now.
This is Me: A to Z
Lifted this from my friend Lisa's blog. Love it!! Here's mine.
This is me - A to Z
A-Age: 41
B-Bed size: Queen
C-Chore you hate: taking out the trash cans
D-Dessert you love: Blueberry pie
E-Essential start your day item: Shower
F-Favorite actor(s): Hmm, none on their acting ability but Mark Feuerstein and Esai Morales are dreamy
G-Gold or Silver: Platinum
H-Height: 5'3"
I-Instruments you play: Flute (including piccolo, C flute, alto and bass) and Piano
J-Job title: TV Associate Director but lately SAHM
K-Kids: 1 daughter, 2 1/2 years
L-Living arrangements: Me, DH, DD and two wacky dogs
M-Mom's name: She'll kill me if I say her real name, thus she goes by Cookie
N-Name something you love to do: Scrapbook!
O-Overnight hospital stay other than birth: Luckily, none to report.
P-Phobia: I have a real issue with mice and rats
Q-Quote you like: Life is a song cue
R-Right or left handed: Right
S-Siblings: one sister almost 3 years younger
T-Time you woke up today: 6:45 am
U-Unique habit: I'm sure I've got at least one, I'll get back on this one
V-Vegetable you hate: I'm not a fan of Cauliflower or Brussel Sprouts
W-Worst habit: I'm sure there are plenty here too - I'm really hard on myself and get frustrated easily
X-X-rays you've had: leg, hand
Y-Yummy food you can make: Cookies
Z- Zodiac Sign: Pisces
Closing in...
Well, I'm now going to the doctor every other day. That's a bit of a PITA driving from my house to Cedars but at least on this Sunday morning, it only took about 30 minutes. I made it before the doctor and nurse. Dr. P upped one of my drugs the other day. Still, so far, no reactions which is really great, other than the black and blue all over my stomach and legs. My follicles are getting bigger and that's all good. At last count, there at least 10 so that's a good number to be working with. We've definitely ruled out the retrieval for Wednesday so it might be Thursday or Friday. I need everyone to cross their fingers, toes and pray to whoever that it's Friday. I have a flute concert on Thursday night that I really can't miss. Dr. P has known this from day 1 and we calculated and re-calculated the calendar and days a million times to avoid Thursday the 8th. Murphy's Law, it might be the 8th. UGH. I've got to go talk to my little fertility doll upstairs and see what she can do about it.
On another good piece of news, my sister is pregnant. I don't think she wants the world to know yet but I don't think too many of her friends read my blog so it shouldn't be a problem. (Sorry Alli. I'll remove this if need be.) She's due at the end of July and that's very exciting. I'm looking forward to being an Aunt and Carly will have a cousin. Now, we just have to hope that we'll be pregnant together and then it'll all be good.
Today is my parents 45th wedding anniversary. That's so cool. They're still so perfect for each other. I look forward to Gregg and I celebrating our 45th and being just as happy.
